whispering

love it when i learn something about myself through lillian. a couple of weeks ago i totally lost my voice. couldn’t talk at all. try giving instructions to a 2 year old with no voice; pretty rough. to add more difficulty to my situation, i had to take care of lillian on my own because cj was in detroit visiting family for a few days.

after a full day of trying to instruct lillian by pure hand motions and facial expressions, i grew tired of getting no where and resorted to the only thing i could do with my voice which was to whisper instructions to her. now the odd thing was that she responded perfectly. in fact she loved it more when i whispered to her. i found my authority had nothing to do with how loud or stern i was. instead my persuasiveness had more to do with feeling safe with me; that there’s just as much if not more motivation behind gentle/tender instruction that invites response.

it really reminded me of something that i’ve been thinking a great deal about lately; that being, a desire to be more vulnerable with others when i share truth. counsel and advice are better taken when one can feel a sense of trust with you and that usually doesn’t come naturally when one is pounding his fist and beating his chest when conveying a point. while i know there are moments when ya just gotta bring the heat to make a point stick, i think most people respond to the kind of truth that comes in the form of a whisper; the gentle nudge that makes you think and reflect internally about your own actions.

learning what it means to be a true gentleman with those i share life with each day.